Alf, an acronym for Alnwick Local Food, was named by a reader after a competition run in the Gazette, if I remember correctly.

So it was with an element of surprise that I paid for a parking ticket in town the other day and discovered a goofy lion staring back at me from the attached sticky label. The beast, sporting a dishevelled mane and two teeth was called, you guessed it, Alf.

The slogans ALF is Watching! and Don't Drop It, Bin It accompanied the cartoon lion as he dumped a banana skin (which should have been composted) and a can (surely a candidate for recycling).

Quite what this Alf stands for is a mystery.

Alnwick Litter … Federation, Foundation, Fury, Furore, Foul-up … who knows?

The Alnwick District Council website sheds little light on the impostor – not a byte to his name could I find.

This town ain't big enough for both of Alfs (a line pinched from a Sparks hit in 1975, while we're on the subject of plagiarism!)

And it is not just a matter of pride – there are kids' hearts to be won over here.

The Lions Club is already feeling persecuted after health and safety regulations put paid to its Santa's sleigh, when the council's insurance company refused to stump up for the cost of insuring Mr Claus against accidents.

The Lions are on the prowl and their claws are out.

Surely the collective powers of imagination at the council could have come up with a different name – even a different animal to represent street cleanliness.

Granted the lion is the most popular symbol around here but wouldn't a magpie or a jackdaw or a rat have been more appropriate where litter's concerned.

And as for the name, what about:
Bin Is Liking Litter (Bill) – I'm sure our chief executive would approve of this one.
Dump Your Litter And Nasties (Dylan)
Trash Every Small Scrap (Tess)
Bin Rubbish In A Netty (Brian)
Take Home All That Can Harm Environmental Rules (Thatcher)
Leave Your Litter Elsewhere (Lyle)
I'm Binning Really Awful Hogwash In Morpeth (Ibrahim)
Garbage And Bins Become You (Gabby)

Readers may like to send in other examples – the possibilities are endless.

So why did they choose Alf? Councils have a habit of stepping on those banana skins these days.